Reminding Ourselves to Remember

I recently had the opportunity to revisit one of my favorite childhood pastimes – something I hadn’t done in over a decade. I went roller skating. Was I taking Aiden for his first experience with wheels on his heels? No. Was I attending a birthday party for some friend’s child or chaperoning some other young person’s event? No. I was just reliving the good ol’ days with some coworkers and the nostalgia of it was overwhelming.

It was yet another reminder to appreciate things as they are happening and not as we look back wistfully in the rare opportunities that we have to relive them. Although I loved roller skating as a child and even as a teenager, I don’t think I ever slowed those wheels down long enough to savor the experience and recognize that I wouldn’t be able to do it forever. I’m certainly not saying that we should take every happy, wonderful moment full of innocence and joy and make it serious, sober, and appreciative. But rather that we should learn to take mental snapshots. We are all so very good at taking digital photos these days – capturing flat, visual representations of the things we experience. But there is so much more to those memories. There are smells, tastes, sounds, feels, emotions, thoughts . . . all connected in an intricate web of vitality. And our minds are capable of cataloging all of it – if we would just take a moment to breathe and remind ourselves to remember. Tell ourselves in a fraction of a second, “This is good!”

As I looked around the rink at all of the other skaters, most of them half my age, I found myself wondering how many of them would remember. The twelve-year-old boyfriend and girlfriend with matching T-shirts skating hand in hand in countless circles. The new recruit to the roller derby team, getting a strong sense of her stride. The flamboyantly gay twenty-something spinning pirouettes at each turn and squealing with delight, not caring what anyone else thought of him. The middle-aged, excessively bearded beginner skating back and forth in the center at a painstaking pace, trying to prove that you can teach and old dog new tricks. The six-year-old little girl with white skates just like mine who put my moves to shame. Will all of these people find themselves in this spot a decade later trying to pull the cobwebs off of these memories? Or will these moments flood back with a vivid force because they LIVED them now? I am very glad I took the opportunity to experience this small part of my past again. And this time I drank it in deeply and will not easily forget.

The Idea Behind the Blog – Making Our Own Happiness

I have learned over the course of my increasingly fast-paced years, that happiness is not something that happens to us.  It is not delivered to our doorstep with a nice red bow on top, just waiting to be opened and enjoyed.  Of course life has its surprising moments that utterly grip us and take our breath away.  But for the most part, I believe, happiness is something we make.   Fulfillment is something we enjoy when we learn to stop taking the little things for granted.  If we constantly brush off all of life’s tiny little beauties because they are ordinary, unimportant, or we’re simply too busy to bother, then we will surely see the color fade out of life and happiness will be hard to come by.  Because, let’s face it, if we wait for the eventful, the enormous, the extraordinary to bring us joy, those moments will be few and far between.  My two year old son has been an amazing teacher of this this lesson.  To him, everything is new.  Everything is amazing.  The tiniest things that we as adults have come to see as commonplace,  can make him quiver with excitement and curiosity.  And, as his primary playmate, I too am learning to be excited with him.  To share in his enthusiasm rather than squelch it.  And, in some ways, he has become more of an influence on me than I have on him.  It is my goal in writing this blog to share that influence with any who care to read.  To find little lights of inspiration and beauty in every day life and highlight them for myself and others to take notice.  To help create happiness.  To appreciate now the things that we’ll remember later.

Photo taken by Reeta Allen in May 2010